I have watched grown men break down and cry
from frustration over things
you and I don't ever stop to think about,
such as a busy signal on a telephone.

Many of us consider no mail as a blessing,
sometimes; however,
many inmates consider "junk mail" as a blessing
because it was sent to them alone.
Many receive no mail at all, Ever.
Some inmates don't know where their family is,
or how to contact them,
sons, daughters, wives or grandchildren.
No One.

Some people will carry a sorrow to their grave,
because they will never see "the other side of the fence"
Some make the best of the situation.
Can you pause for a moment to think what it would be like
to never watch TV alone again,
or be able to watch what you wanted,
or never go fishing or hunting-
to hear the sound of the fall leaves rustle under you feet
as you walk through the woods with you girl or your wife?
If that doesn't shake you,
then how about never being able to hold your husband or wife
when ever you want to,
to pull them close to you and tell them that you love them,
never being able to share their company again,
or to make love again,
as long as you both shall live.
You won't be able to enjoy the children as you should,
or be able to watch them grow up,
to watch him play football,
or to watch her go out on her first date,
and to wait up until she is safely home.
You won't be able to see your grand children grow up,
after your children get married,
at the wedding you missed,
because you were sitting in prison serving a sentence of
"life without parole"
or will sit somewhere on death row.
Where some people fearing,
some praying for their time to come,
for the execution of their sentence.

Many of us work in a noisy environment-
we will stand the pressures and the stresses of the day,
to race home for the comfort of our home
and to see our wife and children,
waiting with open arms to greet us when we arrive.

Imagine living in an environment where the noise seldom stops
and the frustrations always runs high and you have very little,
in any, choice in what you eat, wear, do or go.
You do the same thing day in, and day out,
day after day, year after year, with little change.
With no one to turn to or no one to lean on,
in a place where friends are near non existent
and close relationships are even more rare.
Debts can cost you all that you have to your name,
it can cost you your body, even your life.

My fellow officers and I come to work each day
and see the toll it takes on a man to be placed behind a fence and bars,
to be stripped of the most private and personal act
of being a human being,
such as openly caring for someone, or to cry in front of other people,
because it may be taken as a weakness.
You and I take our freedom for granted.
I can promise you that an inmate will treasure the few moments
that they get to spend on an eight-hour pass
with their wife and children.
That is the very few inmates that are allowed
to take advantage of this privilege.

Many inmates have only a letter or a postcard to hold on to,
to keep them going.
I have sat for hours and talked with men and their problems,
such as their wife has left them,
and she has custody of the children,
or their parole officer is delaying a parole
over a simple matter such as paper work, or a medical examination.
Or the officer didn't get to it, he was on two weeks of vacation.

I have sat and looked at pictures of families,
a wife, of children and pets and many other things.
I have heard stories and the tales about the people in the pictures
and have felt compassion for the both of them.
I have even cried and prayed for these men
when I was alone by myself.

I have often wondered if I had the right to shoot someone
that would attempt to escape.
With in my reach I have a 12- gauge shotgun loaded with .00 buckshot.
If the need were to arise that I should have to use it,
well, it would certainly maim or kill.
I have found an answer.
It is in my Bible.
It tells me that I am to obey all authority:
the State of Alabama is my authority.
It tells me that I am to stop an inmate if he attempts to escape,
to use the force necessary to accomplish this,
which includes deadly force.
If it weren't for God's approval the government wouldn't exist.

My job is hard.
I must see the sorrows and fears of these men
and have compassion as a Christian.
As an officer,
I must at times do things which seem to show little or no mercy.

Parents and young adults, please listen to what I have to tell you.
Teach your children well, to do what is right,
teach them how to tell the difference between right and wrong.
Teach them that is never too late to come back to our living savior,
but most of all teach them how to serve him day to day.
Because if you don't, well,
I have told you some of the things that I see and witness each day
as I walk through a gate,
for my Lord and state.

I will leave you with this Bible verse;
It goes,

Train up a child in the way he should go:
and when he is old, he shall not depart from it.
Proverbs 22:7

Yours truly,

Gary